When I was an adolescent I
was heavy into reading science fiction.
One of my favorite books, at that time, was written by Isaac Asimov and
entitled Childhood’s End. Now that I
think about it, the ending of the book, which I think represented the end of our
species childhood, portrayed new humans, a bunch of teenagers, destroying the
Earth, and all living things, with what amounted to superpowers. The book ended
with them going on into the Universe. I never quite understood then why that
book spoke to me, but here I am, years later, recalling how it accompanied my
own childhood’s ending.
The idea that I might look
at the period of transition that accompanied my move from adulthood into
something else came from Dr. Bill Thomas. He called it the end of adulthood,
and I picked up on his thought, and added thoughts of my own. Out of that
combination comes Adulthood’s End.
For me, adulthood ended
dramatically and clearly in a single surge of blood. I had a hemorrhagic stroke
that delivered me into a new post-adult world. For me, being so thoroughly
disabled, had the same effect as moving me from the world of the productive and
efficient, into a slower world. I am not who I used to be. I had to learn a new
value system, and a new way of operating, to be able to survive and occupy a
very different life. It has been a difficult transition, it took most of 10 years,
and it has resulted in me being happier, and more productive in a community
way, than I’ve ever been.
I have reason, because of my
own bizarre unaided journey, to think much of the same thing is in store for my
age-mates. Adulthood, with its many distorted pursuits, lack of time, and
role-bound identity, is ending. The freedom to become oneself, to determine for
oneself what that means, is finally, and unbelievably, here. To live anew will
likely be hard. Adulthood’s end has been portrayed, by our cultural beliefs, to
be the end. So, going beyond this
place takes unusual courage, and an almost rabid desire to live fully.
Culturally, ageism is heavy, but if those shackles and blinders can be broken,
then another phase of Life comes into view. And it happens when adulthood ends.
There are many benefits that
come with a new, slower life. The life of the elder is full of surprises. Perhaps,
the greatest surprise of all; is that this new life isn’t all about decline.
That, is a cultural assertion that is just plain inaccurate, reflecting as it
does youth-centered ignorance (the way adulthood is defined).
But, this piece is not about
the many pleasant surprises that come with ageing, it is rather an attempt to
focus attention upon the difficult period when adulthood ends. Human life has
(at least) three stages. The one at the end is even more valuable than the one
at the beginning. Integration takes place then, and a human being then
manifests its full potential. But getting there is now very hard. There really
isn’t a meaningful and truly productive finishing school for more-than-adults.
There isn’t a term for the potency of this stage, a potency that carries real
knowledge of how important and beneficial this period is, for individual and
society. Adulthood’s end could be cause for celebration. Retirement parties are
sad reminders of the waste that is endemic now. Adulthood’s end marks a new
beginning that overflows with meaning, relationship, awareness and spiritual
profundity. It is a time of ripening, of fullness, of completion, of wisdom, when
possibilities are actualized.
Adulthood never ends in this
culture, instead one just drops off the edge of the world, it is supposed that one
greys and wrinkles into oblivion. The image of oblivion, that accompanies
ageing, reflects the obliviousness that runs rampant in our immature culture.
Adulthood’s end is difficult
to face. As are most of the stage-changes that come with Life, but it is made
even more difficult, for some impossible, by our societal unwillingness to face
it. Think about that, next time you hear of the anti-aging benefits of some
cosmetic. Adulthood’s end can be delayed, even ignored entirely, if the culture
as a whole (or sufficiently) is willing to stick its head in the sand.
Bill Thomas talks about the
iron law. Each day, no matter what, we wake up a day older than we used to be.
There is an inevitability, to the way things are. Time waits for no one.
Adulthood ends. The stage beyond it; isn’t all about economic activity, but it
has a value that isn’t widely valued today. The transition can be difficult,
and is being made more difficult all the time, but it is important to know
adulthood ends anyway.
Adulthood’s end just might
be the place where a real beginning resides.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
For more pieces like this, go to www.elderssalon.blogspot.com
(2010 thru 2013) and http://www.elderssalon2.blogspot.com (2014 on)
To hear archived versions of our radio program Growing An Elder Culture go to www.elderculture.com
To read excerpts, or otherwise learn, about Embracing Life: Toward A Psychology of
Interdependence go to http://www.davidgoff.net
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