"The privilege of a lifetime is
being who you are. Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world. We cannot
cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy." - Joseph Campbell
An idea came to me this
week. It aroused me, with excitement, fear, determination, and wonder. So, I
hope I can do an adequate job of exploring and expressing this idea.
My world is changing,
as I’m getting older. Things are morphing into new forms. Configurations are
occurring to me that I barely understand, and that call to me, to give them a
voice. This is one of them, an embryonic awareness, which has come squalling
over my horizon, calling for me to soothe it, by considering the change in my
reality that it foretells. I am bewildered and beguiled, and I know that if I
want to keep open, I’ve got to welcome this guest too.
So here goes.
I’ve been trying to
pay attention to what happens to consciousness as we humans age. There are a
lot of us now, outliving our ancestors, in greater numbers than ever before.
Witnessing, and feeling, this, momentous build-up, has put me in a wondrous
state of mind. I think mother-nature is up to something. I can’t shake the
feeling that evolution is re-working the human race, putting more emphasis upon
the grey fruit of this strange journey — than in the past. So, I’m paying
attention, and noticing that old people aren’t all, what they used to be.
One of the things
I’ve noticed is that some old folks, I call them elders, seem to see things a
lot different than the rest of us. There are many ways this seems true to me,
but I want to concentrate on only one now. I don’t know how, or when, this
happens, but it seems that some older people develop, what I call, paradoxical
awareness. They seem to be more comfortable, and even grow fluent in, bringing
the opposites together. An indicator of the onset of this awareness, appears to
be the statement, “The more I know, the more I know how little I know,” that
comes out of some old folks mouths.
For whatever reason,
they have arrived at an experience of the world, that is more complex,
mysterious, and unified than many of us have. It isn’t unusual for someone in
this state of mind to extol the beauty and miraculousness of the world, and to
be equally aware of the horror that mankind has visited upon our planet. For
them, the joy of being alive, is deeply rooted in awareness of the world as it
is. They seem to exude an equanimity that defies logic.
I noticed this, and
sometimes feel myself capable of it. I can feel the world turning, and I have a
sense, that despite the deleterious impact of humankind, the miracle of life is
here to stay. This thrills and humbles me; it makes me want to spread the
vision. I don’t exactly know how to do that, and that’s OK, because I have the
sense that evolution, that Life, is already at work changing things. I’m just
here to witness and praise the miracle that includes injustice.
I can remember the
dark days after my stroke, when I had an undiagnosed brain syndrome, which was
slowly stealing my functionality. I was dying. I was angry — so disappointed
with Life. The Mystery contained a darkness I didn’t want to know. I didn’t
think I could care about a life that cared so little for me, and others who
were equally diminished. My face took on, what seemed to be a permanent frown. The
abyss ate me. I went down into the darkness, and came out of it barely alive,
but aware, that my life had never been mine, and that now, I knew I was Life’s
life, and that the darkness is only the light I most fear.
I believe elder
activism is being transformed, not by we humans, but by Life. Ageing is
bringing about, for some, a change in awareness. This changing awareness is
leading to other changes. As I am getting older, I am becoming more aware of my
own, and others, hubris. I am less inclined to judge. I am accepting more of my
own limitations, and the limitations of others. The world has shown me, how
Life moves in strange, unpredictable and inexorable ways.
Lately, I’ve found
myself thinking. My activism has been largely based on my reaction to the
injustice in the world. My actions followed. I assumed that injustice threatens
Life. What I now see is that injustice is in the world as part of the wholeness
that is Life. My actions must now incorporate that awareness. It feels right to
keep acting, but without my former certainty, and with a more astutely humble
reverence for the mysteriousness of Life. My actions will no longer be so much
against others. Instead, I think I will be paying closer attention to Life, and
dwelling in not knowing instead of certainty. It helps to think that Life is
pre-eminent, and knows what it is doing.
Generally, I like
ageing. Getting older has its well-documented problems. What it doesn’t have
yet, is a well articulated description of its potentials. Along with the losses
come gains. The gains aren’t obvious, they haven’t been fully described, but it
seems Life is seeing to it, that they are available now, regardless of how well
described they are. These same gains are changing the way activism, the love of
Life, is being played out. In my view, this is evolution coming through us. It
is the Universe doing its activist thing.
* * * * * * * *
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For more pieces like this, go to http://www.elderssalon2.blogspot.com (2014 on)
To hear archived versions of our radio program Growing An Elder Culture go to www.elderculture.com
To read excerpts, or otherwise learn, about Embracing Life: Toward A Psychology of
Interdependence go to http://www.davidgoff.net
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